Anglicans (apologies to Robbie Williams)

To get the most out of this post, please sing out loud. Don't pretend you don't know the tune. Or that you're too cool. You know you're not. You know you want to. Do it now, and give everyone a laugh. I promise you'll feel better for it.

I sit and wait
As the choir sings songs so out of date
And do we see
This is where we’ll all still be
When we’re grey and old?
‘cos I’ve been told
that salvation isn’t bought or sold
so when I’m sitting in my pew
thinking deep thoughts as I do
before taking wine and bread…
I’m loving Anglicans instead.

And through it all they offer me protection
A little love and affection
Whether I’m right or wrong
And down the sea of doubt
Wherever it may take me
I know this church won’t break me
When I come to call, they won’t forsake me…
(da da da da da…)
I’m loving Anglicans instead.

When I’m feeling weak
And my faith is on a losing streak
I look around
And see those whose doctrine’s not quite sound
But I know this is my place
For me the others are a waste
And when all is done or said…
I’m loving Anglicans instead.

Just let me say, I’m keen on orthodoxy
And I think the Pope looks quite foxy
Whether he’s right or wrong
But on the other hand, should I start feeling fundamentalist
I’d rather root canal with a dentist
It’s really not my plan. I’ll stick with the C of E…
I’m loving Anglicans instead.

And furthermore, I’ve tried dunking with the Baptists
Tree-hugging with the alt worshippists
It was too much like hard work
So here I’ll stand, creed and hassock notwithstanding
These Anglicans aren’t too demanding
I’m becoming quite a fan. Especially of Rowan….
I’m loving Anglicans instead.

They won’t forsake me…
I’m loving Anglicans instead.

There. Feeling better? I know I am. Actually this expresses the deep affection I really do have for Anglicanism. And I really have hugged a tree. There are photos. But ironically, of course.


Danny said…
Brilliant!! (And I don't mind confessing to being a middle aged Robbie fan) Think it translates over to CoS ...I'm loving Presbyterians ...Mmm just as well really...
Tracey Wheeler said…
Thanks Danny. Actually I'm thinking of writing a follow-up, in praise of all the Scientologist literature we keep getting. It'll be called 'I'm loving Aliens instead'...
Ellen Loudon said…
really love this ta. Have you noticed Robbies back in rehab! He ho.
Tracey Wheeler said…
As should the Anglican Church be, judging by recent reports. Poor old Rowan.
bigdaddystevieB said…
Really enjoyed this! Many thanks. Have yet to sing it out loud (to myself), but am working on it.
The Ranter said…
Fantatic! Good reminder of the good bits about the Anglicans... I need some reminding sometimes, particularly recently, but I do have a similar affection for them as you (though not Rowan at the moment). Looking forward to the next version!
jeznash said…
Absolutely Awesome!
Apparently he (robbie)wrote the original after seeing a christian icon during his stay at the 'clouds' rehab. Trivia, but interesting.
Mark Russell said…
This is fantastic! Stumbled across your blog by accident!!! This made me smile a lot....well done!

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